Media Trackers Exposes Their Own Flopsweat

Media Trackers, like the MacGuyver Institute and WPRI, are sham groups that serve no purpose than to be the propagandists for the conservatives and for Corporate America.  They get their funding from the likes of the Koch brothers and the Bradley Foundation.

But they do serve one useful purpose.  They are a gauge of sorts to see how nervous the conservatives are at any given time.  The more desperate the story, the more desperate or their masters.

Judging from a recent story from Media Trackers, they must be very nervous as the movement in which the people of Wisconsin rise up and reclaim their state by recalling Scott Walker begins.

This propagandist group, represented by one Collin Roth, if that's even his real name, claims they have "exposed" a cabal of lefty politicians and community leaders who are poised to bring Walker down by following the rigged rules the Republicans have rammed through in an effort to shred the Constitution and stop the people from exercising their rights.

Their proof of this cabal? The alleged members received an email!

Obviously, because they received an email, they must be in cahoots.

But this gave the researchers here an idea.  Why not find out who these people at Media Trackers are by seeing what emails they might be receiving.

Seeing what kind of group Media Trackers is, our crack research team concluded that anything dealing with them closely resembles spam, since that is what they produce.  Hence, they further concluded that the best way to see who Media Trackers is was to check the spam files.

Preliminary reports show that it is possible the members of Media Trackers are friends with various Nigerian princes and widows and English attorneys who are involved in a money laundering scheme.  It is also believed, judging by the likely emails that they receive, they are looking for high-paying easy work, cute girls that want to chat, and suffer from erectile dysfunction.

And now you know and knowing is half the battle.

Walker 2016

From the inbox, slightly edited for grammatical purposes:

This morning Scott Walker announced, at his campaign headquarters, WGOP 620AM, that he will be running for President in 2016.He says he came to that conclusion when his POINT man, Charlie Rove Sykes, POINTED out to him that after studying that guy's background that in there now that he could do the same thing by playing the Community Organizer game. So here is his plan.

As soon as elected Governor he will get rid of DOT in its entirety. In its place he will the method the Amish use for barn raising. Every business in the area where highway/bridge work is needed the businesses in the area will furnish the materials and the people who live in the area will do the actual work. Community Action in action and at NO cost to the Taxpayer. On that alone he claims he will have the budget balanced by the end of his term with a trillion dollar surplus. Jeff Wagner then asked Scott if there are that many Amish that live in the area. Also, Jeff, pointing out that he is a law and order kind of person, questioned whether it is constitutional to make him get his hands dirty if his street needed repair and they used that Community thingy.

For the prison problems he would build 3 large barns, as those 8,000 cow dairy farms do and put all the prisoners in them which would cut the prison budget by at least 75% as they could get rid of at least 90% of those nasty State employees guarding the prisons. As that prisoners have no rights, they should be easy to herd. He would then put Jeff Wagner in charge of the Early Release Program.

As for MPS, Walker said he would appoint Charlie Rove Sykes to head up the entire system. He says he can think of no one more qualified to work with the Union and take away any benefits that they have earned and, if necessary, replace the teachers with prisoners to teach. Another 95% savings. Then Jeff Wagner wondered why he couldn't have the job. Even though he doesn't have any children he could teach those brats as well as anybody. Remember he has a niece and nephew.

With a plan like that how could he not be elected President? He finally did give Jeff Wagner a job. He appointed hims "Official Finger Pointer" and "Questioner of Anything That Anyone Does Even If He Knows Nothing About It." In other words, it's the same job he has now.

He said he had already measured for drapes in the mansion and checked the concrete on the dome of the Capitol so none would fall on the sidewalk. Safety for public has always been high on his list.

Finally, so Charlie Rove Sykes would be able to do his new job better, he will be moving to the Central City so he will better understand their perceived problems. Rove Sykes had no comment about that statement.

See you in Washington.

Privatize The Fire Department

I do love me some good satire, don't you?



I wonder if Charlie Sykes or Patrick McIlheran will even get it.

Building Better Bodies Through Conservatism

Other Side has quite the satirical post on the new fad sure to tear through the Cheddarsphere like a talk show host goes through hair products: The Conservative Flab Program, which include inspirational quips like this:

Get ready to add to those stubborn problem areas. With the help of Charlie Sykes, you'll be out of your skinny jeans in no time and will haved joined the legion of conservative bloggers nationwide fighting liberals, socialists and personal hygeine.

If you don't completely transform your body within 30 days just like I did, Charlie will keep your money and chastise you personally on-line and on his radio show (hey, you got on). So what are you waiting for? C'mon, let's battle liberalism together.

Image Is Everything

Almost every company, every movement and even many people, use images to help identify themselves.

Everyone is familiar with the Nike Swoop, Obama's campaign symbol, Superman's S, just to name a few examples.

It's just good marketing.

So, in light that Kevin Fischer feels a little persecuted lately, I, in an effort to help the man out, got my Royal Photoshop Technicians to use their mad photoshopping skillz, and create a logo for Fischer.

They got to work, and here is the results of their endeavors:

I hope he appreciates it.

NOTE: Original photo is from Milwaukee Magazine, as was identified here.

What A Difference A Day Makes

When I went to bed last night, I was but a modest man who had defended an honest man who was being persecuted by those who sought to quiet his voice.

This morn, I have found myself given the title King of the Hate Left. To my further amazement, I found people, both near and far, praising me and calling me by this title. I was sorely stunned by these turn of events.

But, after much thought, though I lief remain that modest man, trying to promote the values of truth, liberty and justice, I found that I could no longer be so. Thusly, though, yea verily, I fear that this crown shall weigh heavily upon by burdened brow, I humbly and gratefully accept this honor that hath been bestowed on me.

But, my brethen and sisters, do not capitulate, nor genuflect to the likes of me. No, rather, stand up, my people, my brave knights of goodness, my dear friends. Stand up and stand with me, for together we shall seek, and find, and protect the holiest of holies, the all-powerful Liberal Template!

Who will stand with me, in this just and greatest of endeavors? Stand up and be counted, I say!
Forsooth, you are all dear to me, and I can think of no greater honor, I ask no greater boon, than to have you at my side.

No, Jessica, THIS Is Satire

Sometimes McBride can really get on a roll, and manages to get absolutely nothing right. This post is a classic example. Let's look at it, shall we?

First, we have this paragraph:

Some liberal is apparently demanding that Patrick McIlheran remove Texas Hold Em blog from his blogroll because of a piece of strongly worded satire Peter posted. They are apparently implying Patrick shouldn't get to keep his job if he links to Peter.

Um, Jessica, the "some liberal" is Other Side. And he wasn't objecting to Tex's Hitlery post about Hillary Clinton (although he could have). The objection was to a post in which Tex called a group of Spanish-speaking people "chattering chihuahuas", a blatantly racist comment. If McBride were to actually read a liberal's post, she might have picked up on that. But then again, she might be afraid of being exposed to reality.

Then, McBride comes out with this:

Worry about your own blogrolls, liberals. Stop trying to destroy other people's careers by drumming up supposedly job-killing offense and faux outrage; focus on your own jobs.

Hmm, I wonder what Kevin Barrett would think of that advice coming from her? But McBride's not done yet:

Save your outrage for the people who use racial and sexual slurs, like Dog Chapman or Illusory Tenant.

As mentioned above, that is what Other Side was doing. Jessica, please stop doing your selective outrage. And learn to let go of things, would you?

But McBride's coup de grace (or in McBridean French: coop de grease) is this:

Otherwise, get over yourselves. It was SATIRE. It's not meant to be taken literally.

Satire is defined as: Irony, sarcasm, or caustic wit used to attack or expose folly, vice, or stupidity, per the American Heritage Dictionary. That would also be the perfect description of Whallah!'s approach to McBride and the rest of the right-wing local media. Instead, she labels us as an "abuse/hate blog". Go figure.

One would think that a person who is receiving tax dollars to allegedly teach college students journalism, would at least know the definitions of words, and how to use those words appropriately.