Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Whallah! Causes of crime identified

At last, we know what causes Milwaukee's crime problem, thanks to Jessica McBride and her Waukesha Freeman column.

Everyone's talking about all of the wrong things, like jobs, poverty and guns, she says.

The McBride theory:
What should we discuss? Teenage motherhood, absentee fathers, mentorship, poor choices, moral breakdown and high school drop out rates, for starters.
So there you have it. The root causes of crime are teenage sex, deadbeat dads, and kids quitting school.

Maybe in her next column she'll discuss what to do about it. Bet not.


  1. She can't be that sick of the Milwaukee crime debate, she just spent all that time hammering away at her typewriter.

    Then if you go to the main page, there's a story about a guy who murdered his girlfriend and another about one who went all Lizzie Borden on his mom while she slept.

    When, dear God, when are these white folks going to stop killing people in Waukesha County?

    If only they got a job flipping burgers and kept in their pants.

  2. McBride doesn't need to discuss the solutions, she lives it. All we have to do is break up a happy family of a rich professional and marry him/her, and Whallah! No need to commit crime...except for some driving violations, of course.

  3. To say nothing of white male professional football players who sexually molest their teenage babysitters, but . .. . that's right! He wasn't convicted of anything because Jessica's husband bungled the prosecution.

    Back to her original point: if teenage mothers are the primary cause of crime, then she ought to make a healthy donation to Planned Parenthood so that all teens have access to birth control, and she should make sure that all public schools provide medically accurate sex education.